2025 Recap: Down the Memory Lane of a Toxic Year

2025???? Heavy Yoruba sigh

What a year! This year put us through it! But we survived. Survival we? And my God, was it fast or was it just me? Because it felt just like yesterday when I was sitting in my stylist’s chair on the 31st of December 2024, having a pixie wig molded to my head. It seemed really recent, my first Monday back at work, when I was feeling self conscious with the pixie cut and kept sending multiple videos of me turning my head every which way, desperate for reassurance from my friends that I did not look like a little Chinese boy with a horrible haircut. Wow!

And life is crazy because on the 31st of December, while I waited for my stylist to finish with another client, I saw someone else seated in the salon chair getting a pixie cut for the new year. But guess what? Hers looked suited for her and she didn’t look like a little Chinese boy. She opted for black while my choice was brown, and she wore a halter neck top. Maybe I would wear a halter top the next time I try to experiment with a pixie!

Anyways, 2025, as I said, tested me, but it also elevated me. The year felt somewhat like an aggressive fitness trainer who keeps adding more weights to the barbell because they know you can do better. It felt like punishment then, but it eventually made you stronger!

In this essay, I will spell out how the year went, the shege, the gbasgbos, and the soft life! Sit with me.

THE SHEGE

Pain: PAIN! I experienced multiples of pain last year in every way imaginable. Financial strain, pain. I got stretched and stretched, and I was surprised at how elastic I could be! Pain of betrayal, both from people and this darn government! I was in distress from Nigeria being Nigeria, and it was all over most of my posts in 2025. Hardly would you read a post that didn’t have the markings of the strife going on in the country. But we move.

Then the pain that could be felt. Physical pain! Gym pain. Procedures for my wellbeing that literally had me shedding hot tears! Injection pain. Aching feet from trekking. Bashing my leg against the rusty metal of a Danfo bus numerous times. Hitting my head on the roof of the bus because the driver is too hasty and could not just stop for me for one freaking minute! Ha. I experienced it all in 2025.

Disgrace: When I say disgrace, I am referring to scenarios where what you feel for yourself is a deep sense of pity and second-hand embarrassment, but the crazy thing is, you are the one embarrassed! But I tend to leave my body in situations like that and observe myself as a neutral person, and that is when the deep sense of embarrassment for myself starts. I even start feeling pity for myself.

You know that emotion you felt when the viral video of a child in an orphanage got ignored multiple times as he reached for the ice cream being shared? Yes! Then you know how worse you felt for him when he smiled in embarrassment because he felt embarrassed? Yes! Imagine me as the little boy. Do you feel sorry for me now? Exactly!

it’s okay, don’t cry for me, I am over it now

THE GBASGBOS

Dying: I have died many times this year. The death of ego. The death of humility. It sounds like a negation, but that is exactly how it occurred. Ego death showed me yet again that the law of averages does not discriminate and can come for you anytime. You are not too religious to be flung in every direction by life.

Death of humility because I was forced to die in that sense! No, I won’t tell my seamstress to start adding shoulder pads to my outfits so I can be higher than everybody. I am referring to the holding back, self-doubt, and second guesses. I was forced to kill that side of me, and it was an ugly and nasty death!

Literary relapse: I only read five books this year, with one boring, dead romance American novel I got for my birthday that I am still struggling to finish. I have a deep disgust for cringe romance novels. EW! If I read another novel of the unsure babe who always gets anxiety and all sorts of emotions beside the cool, calm, collected guy, I will SCREAM!

Now, I will go ahead and blame that book and the Nigerian cringy version Broken as the reason why I did not read more books this year. JK JK. I really have to do better because my vocabulary has dwindled severely, and in this clime where all the youth do is speak in TikTok! And I cannot for the life of me imagine myself using “clock it” the wrong way in a group setting.

Rejections: I got rejected more than once by different literary competitions I submitted my works to. It hurt a bit, but at least I made the effort. I’m not going to lie, the juicy money would have come in handy, you know, but yeah yeah, I am going to add it to my TED Talk when I become a bestselling author of something something something. I also tried to leave my current job and multiple doors were shut in my face via mail. #FallsDownandRollsontheGroundinHotTears!

THE SOFT LIFE

Urgh! I love this part and could not wait to get to it because despite the pain and suffering, the disappointment and betrayal, the hurt, I could still taste the rainbow!

Achievements: I was able to tick off a lot of my goals for the year! Personal development, checked! I passed all my certifications with flying colours. You can now address me as Kaothar CPM, PSM, PMP, LMNOP, VIP, ABC, FMMCCC. Because what is sweeter in life than being introduced at a function and all your qualifications being called out for over two minutes? YES!

I also got my ass into the gym, even though I had to get back out because Nigeria and other things almost took my life. But I pushed myself till Q3 before I got dropped off. Back and better in 2026!

I alsooooo got into a programme I have wanted for agessssssssssssssssssssssssssssss. Congratulate me, this is no mean feat.

Enjoyment: I had a ball this year. Nigeria was pressing my neck, but I was still managing to stuff my face with FOOD!

In different places all over Laygurssss, and I ENJOYED EVERY BIT OF IT! Imagine not enjoying these experiences now that it is tax season? Olololo. I also grooved around Laygurss. I could have gone out of Lagos to them cute resorts, but my parents don’t have ransom money to pay!

Thank goodness the year is over. I will not miss 2025 at allllll! Thank you God for the fresh start that 2026 will surely usher in.

In fact,  I started 2026 by wolfing down food in different textures and tastes! What connotes a great year if not eating free food and having your fridge packed with doubles of it as well?

Anyways, word for 2026. Keep being the badass you are wherever you may be. Bet on yourself more, dear, and enjoy your life.

Life is for the living.

Ciao!