This writer was minding her business this morning until she saw Linda Ikeji’s epistle and everything changed. Come on her epistle made that our business right? Right?
Who was that for? Us? Wait what? I thought she was a self made confident woman? Sis why the sudden need to explain your life choices and what you choose to do with your body? You are almost 40 with a money that is longer than a BRT bus, so whatsup with the epistle, yarning of dust and the unfunny lol at every point in your statement?
Let me tell y’all why.
One, Linda has spent most of her time preaching celibacy and keeping legs closed. She told ladies not to give out their meow meow to men and honour it instead. She said keeping the cookie jar closed and air tight is the best for the cookie jar because celibacy ish. Many people followed her advise and kept the cookie jar closed because aunty Linda said so.
Two, Miss Ikeji is always ready to jump on any train that is going to SHAME BABY MAMAS BOULEVARD. She spares no words in showing her scorn for them. She revels in mocking them and sure had a field day with throwing ‘baby mama’ into every scathing remark.
And that explains the epistle. Linda feel obligated to explain herself because she realized what she did is hypocritical. Linda feels the need to set things straight because she realized she was preaching celibacy and having her meow meow stroked on the side. Linda feels the need to explain why she brought an innocent soul into the world because she has hurt and mocked others who ended up as baby mamas due to circumstances beyond their control. Linda feels she owes the world an explanation when everybody have moved on from her gist and are anticipating 2019 elections. Linda wants people to care so bad but they don’t. They just want to read juicy gists and roast her like she deserves!
Linda wants sympathy when she never showed women who were in such situation any sympathy. She used her big platform to tear these women’s reputation and image to shreds, she presented baby mamas as cheap prostitutes but she wants to be seen as a saint and not a cheap prostitute!
Linda owes the innocent girls she has mentored. She owes them a big apology for disillusioning them. It is absolutely good to be celibate when you have a congent and sensible reason and not just because a celebrity said so. She owes these girls who look up to her every moves a double apology, she needs to tell them she is not a saint, not perfect and definitely doesn’t have pure ways or clean hands. She needs to let these children know she is a hypocrite.
Who are you to ask girls not to sleep with men for money? Linda dear better don’t tow towards that part, just keep enjoying the next eggplant that comes your way. And look at you shaming women with high body count. One eggplant doesn’t make you better than those with more. What are you saying? Shaming people for their choices again? Let’s finish shaming you first!
Linda felt the need to repeatedly tell us her baby daddy is not married. We are nobody’s fool. Marital status don’t go on and off like like NEPA. Honestly people don’t care but because you know how you have promoted a fake saintly facade you needed to explain and re explain!
How come she forgot to tell us in details about the engagement? She was spotting an engagement ring months before her suprise baby. Yeah surprise baby because Linda said she fell pregnant! What else happens when a grown woman have sex and allows the sperm in? A mansion in Banana island? So what about the proposal ma’am? Why did you forget to also tell us about the proposal too? Did he go down on one knee? Did you guys jump into the third mainland bridge for the proposal party? I mean come on we should have seen that. You should have leaked it before all this drama you know, considering how loud you can be.
And how do you break up with someone who never claimed you? He never even claimed the baby you brought forth. Linda who are you fooling? Are you breaking up with yourself after you engaged yourself? Linda pull down that sceeen. We can see you. We are nobody’s fool.
Dear Linda Ikeji. No amount of epistle and statements will save you from backlash and insults. Heck you did worse and you know it. No amount of wealth and gifts will change the fact that your baby was born out of wedlock. Nothing will make him not be called a bastard. It will get more intense and more insulting. Focus on protecting your child and molding him into a confident man with high self esteem. Teach him money isn’t everything and being a hypocrite is one of the greatest evils man is capable of. Tell him never to mock people for their present situations because life has a funny way of getting to us all. Don’t forget to teach him also to never lie and twist details. That one is very important.