My grandmother once said ‘don’t chase money and forget to live.’ This is not me trying to sound like a wisdom dispenser or a motivational speaker quoting a sage. This is me trying to talk about how we humans revolve our lives around money and forget existence.

A special apology first, to those who have vehemently refused to give up on me and my erratic disappearances. Who would have, as I’ve seen, refreshed the blog times without number in the last few weeks, seeing nothing but that old boring post. Allow me to humbly apologize and give the reason for my absence – beloved, I have been chasing money! Yes you heard right.

In the wake of getting thrust into adulthood lane, responsibility avenue and earning money city. I became feverishly consumed with a senseless need to do more in order to earn more. The reason for this as I have said is to earn more even though the officers saw to it that we are well taken care off in every aspect. However, my overzealousness and eagerness – that comes when one is opportune to try that which one has been eyeing for long – pushed me into making what would have been a horrendous mistake for the rest of my service year. The last two months have been horrible and I was miserable through it all.

You see, it all started on a temperate day, because I could remember being holed up in the room when one of the corp members in my batch sauntered in. She told us she just got employed to guide some kids through their assignment from Monday to Thursday for a reasonable sum of money. My eyes twitched and my nose picked up the money scent like a niffler. I watched half admirably and half enviously as she suantered off wishing I could also get an offer to tutor some kids for a reasonable amount of money. I should have known people don’t say ‘careful what you wish for’ for nothing.

The demon or angel swishing past that day granted my request for I was soon met with an offer less than a week after. I smirked throughout the rest of the day thinking of the juicy bonuses that come with tutoring an officer’s kid. First week went by grudgingly, second week, I struggled to push through, by the third week I was cursing anyone who dared to remind me that it was almost time for me to go take those kids their lessons. Now let me make something clear, it wasn’t the kids that I find troublesome even though they can be mischievous, rather it was the stress and wear that comes with it. My head automatically calculates the amount of time i have to rest every day before i go take the kids. I feel dreary when I have to drag myself from a much needed sleep just to get to the venue on time and oh dear lord, the chicken smell I have got to endure (yes, they rear chicken). Day in day out I crane my neck to teach two highly inquisitive kids while trying unsuccessful to block out the nauseating smell of chicken with my scarf. It would have been manageable if their mum also doesn’t stylishly push out the toddler who can’t grasp a pencil the proper way, who causes most of the mayhem by tearing off book pages, peeing nonchalantly, bawling if she is not allowed to smear crayons all over the walls and running off from time to time with my phone. I return back to my room everyday looking like one who just spent the whole day on a construction site, red eyed, hungry, thirsty and quick tempered.

Who send me message?

My mum began to express her worries whenever she sees my pictures.

‘What is happening you are getting lean fah’ she would ask.

I told her no that prominent neck bone is fashionable. People express their fears when I speak to them on the phone. I barely have time to cook nor eat. I was just always too tired, I mastered the ignoble act of turning up when food is about to be cooked and wouldn’t leave until it got served. My food stuff get spoilt, the pepper I buy when I try to cook also get rotten because I will forget it one way or the other. I spent most of time resting. Resting from emotional stress, psychological worries and physical pain.

That was the life I was living until common sense whispered to me and i listened. I learnt not everyone is cut out for something. Situations are different. People also have different capabilities and threshold for stress. I Kaothar, Oluwakemi Abdualzeez cannot put myself through stress. I eventually pulled myself away from torture and my life has been stress and chicken smell free.


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