I read about sex for the first time at the age of seven, I was an avaricious reader then and would read anything, anywhere, anytime.. From the groundnut wrap, boli wrap(roasted plantain) ,guguru wrap (popcorn) , to old newspapers, magazines, drugs instructions, cosmetic literatures name it, I would read in the toilet while I was pooing, while I was eating, while I was watching movie and could stay awake all night with a novel, every time I turn a page a new hunger arises and the curiosity to know what the end would be always would keep me awake all night long, I would read with badlights, sunlight weak lamp lights, reflections.
The first time I read a magazine about sex, I was bewildered and could not make head nor tail out of all I read but with time I began to put two and two together, and finally made sense of all I have read, I realized all what my mum used to say about getting pregnant from touching were lies and I countered her one day, we were in her room with a friend of hers and I was the topic, then I just started seeing my period so life was pretty awkward and messy then, they started advising me and my mum ended it with “if you let a boy touch you with his hand, you would get pregnant”, I laughed and shook my head “it is a lie mum” , my mum’s mouth fell open and she asked me to repeat what I said and I did, her friend smiled wryly and started rebuking my mum for trying to give me the wrong type of sex education, they started probing and demanded to know all I know, I just giggled and told them I knew what I said only and nothing else (a lie) and I learnt it in Home Economics class (another lie). That settled everything.God forbid my mum knowing her eleven year old daughter knows about sex.
Humans naturally are curious beings who love to search for knowledge, half knowledge always result in disasters, most mums would rather threaten their child never to relate with the opposite sex than educate them about their body, the opposite sex and every other thing in between. Sex discussion is regarded as a taboo which must be discussed in hush hush tones or not mentioned at all in most homes. Many have fallen into the trap of DO NOT LET A BOY TOUCH YOU, with the belief that pregnancy only comes from touching when actually the touching meant is actually another kind of touching which actually was not properly explained to the child. I know of a mum that encourages her son to use condom and even buys a pack for him, all she says while giving them to him is he should never ever impregnate a girl, but it is okay for him to sleep around? What about telling him the sexual risks involved? This is a very despicable behaviour which encourages patriarchal domination and the boy might start seeing girls as nothing but good time objects.
Sex education does not mean you are teaching your child to be immoral, sex education means lecturing your child on his or her anatomy and that of the opposite sex, what sex is really all about, sexualy transmitted diseases, consequences of early sex and premarital sex, the emotional and psychological consequences of having sex without mincing words or evading questions raised by the child. Sex education reduces the chances of a child getting molested, they would know better when Aunty T tried to touch his pee-pee or Uncle G wanted to sit her on his laps, they would not be scared to report cases of abuse or molest whenever it happens despite threats if they are well educated .
Sex education helps the individual before marriage and after marriage if they chose to get married, lots of home have been destroyed due to the issue of sex, the woman’s frigidity, the man’s cluelessnes or lack of interest mostly brought about by history of sexual abuse or inadequate knowledge which could have been prevented.
Sex education does not promote immorality, it builds the person and enables you know what you are going in for if you chose to have premarital sex and the responsibilities and risks involved, it makes people who chose to remain chaste more determined and less likely to fall for the craps and myths surrounding sex that their friends pass around.
Educate yourself, what does sex education mean to you? and when was the first time you learnt something about sex? . #xoxo